Mutant Crocs

I do not know why I have such lucid dreams. One of my coworkers said that people who dream vividly are actually brilliant. In response, another coworker told me that there are exceptions to every rule. Ha.

Last night, I had multiple dreams. I will share with you one of those wacky night stories.

I find myself in a dense jungle. For some reason I am a large boa constrictor. I slither my way up a large tree and peer off into the distance. A few hundred yards away, a small alligator climbs up into a tree quickly......then a thunderous roar shakes the jungle and out breaks a monstrous crocodile. I witness the huge beast snap down on the defenseless alligator.

After the croc finished his snack, he whipped his gaze at me. Within seconds, I am trying to squirm my way further up the tree. Without much luck, my snake body falls into the gaping jaws of the animal. Although my snake body was digested, I am left hanging on a branch clothed only in my whitey tighties.

Whattttt????

Too Much Mario Brothers?

Who has seen Paranormal Activity?

I love love love scary movies. This movie wasn't really that terrifying.....but I have had two nightmares since with slight references to this movie.

Nightmares...no me gusta:

Sitting in the back passenger seat of a SUV I look over to see who is driving. It happens to be one of my female coworkers. She looks normal and is concentrating on the road in front of her. What is not normal is the 'person' directly behind her. At first glance it appears to be a clone of my coworker, but demonized. She has this ghoul-like face with a huge jaw dropped and immense eyes glistening with hate. I do what anyone else would do I scream at the creature.....scream some more....looking out the window and see my grandmother who has a white fro begin ripping out tufts of her hair and running around......screaming continues I look back at the monster sitting next to me (still screaming) and finally wake up.

Falling back to sleep I slip into another slightly less creepy dream:

I am in a large house with my parents, brother and sister. Everyone is scared. We have locked all the doors and windows....we are peering intently at the front door that has a decorative glass middle section. Suddenly, a 7 foot tall thin demon with horns pops up outside the door. As soon as he appeared, he disappears. Now, we do not see, but somehow know that people are being swept away by invisible beings outside the house. After a short amount of time from seeing the demon at the door, my brother decides to check outside to see if it is clear. Bad mistake. I witness my brother fall to the grown and dragged towards this hole in the bushes. Instinctively, I jump after him and grab his arm.....I am too late. I watch the ground swallow him up.

In a matter of seconds,

I am standing next to Taylor underground. I guess the creature snatched me as well. We both are standing in a low ceiling tunnel lined with small lanterns. There is a lot of bustling amidst a group of short creatures. They are gnome like and have red construction paper caps on their heads. They threaten us with rolled up paper and begin tossing paper at us like ninja stars. I do not feel threatened by them as I had with the demon at the doorstep before. We do not stay in in the tunnel for long, but are teleported to a huge open pasture. Immediately, we realize that we are not safe. Dive bombing us are those impish creatures on top of giant finches. The birds beaks thrash at us every fatal swoop as if they are trying to eat us. I react by trying to jump on a finch when it gets close enough....... in order to fight for my life against these demons. Following suit, the rest of the human captives commandeer the birds as well. Now, a huge air battle commences BUT a I wake up.

The End

Africa and Invisible Terrorists

I wonder why I always have multiple dreams.

Dream 1:

I appear in the middle of chaos.

Hundreds of terrorists are posted around every corner desiring to destroy me along with my fellow soldiers.

Within a kitchen, we found ourselves fighting a large, angry man who wielded a large dagger in his hand. Flawlessly, he chopped my comrades to pieces. I luckily picked up a couple of primitive blades to seek vengeance for my fallen friends. However, the terrorist went invisible and proceeded to pierce my body countless times. I tried fending the thrusts blindly, but I fell to the ground. I spent my last conscious moments thanking my other dying countrymen.

Dream 2:

Middle of the African Sahara Desert. A huge dust storm sweeps through. Thousands of cars suddenly appear all around me. When the dust settles, one of my friends from the Dominican, Faith Amelingmeier, appears.

She has me follow her away in a jeep to an unknown destination. We pull up to a very commercialized touristy area. We get out and walk up to the entrance where a long line had formed. We pass by the tourists and I see a large waterfall where people are cliff jumping. Faith begins to walk through the river to get a better look. I follow her and the only thing I can think of is how I forgot I left my iPhone in my pocket.

The End

Pools, girls, and trolls

I apologize for my break from blogging. Truthfully, I probably had some amazing dreams that I did not share....lo siento. Last nights dreams were quite interesting. I will share the most vivid of them.

It was a sunny day out at the pool. I believe I was with family members, but did not recognize any of them. They were obese. Along with the family, were three or four girls and a couple of boys. We were all jumping around in the pool. The next moment, I was suspended under water looking at the group of girls getting ready to leave. One of the girls was grabbing my leg while another one behind me was holding onto my arm. I was not able to see the girl behind me, but I fell in love with her. Ha. After a long time underwater (I even breathed water), I came on up. Everyone was worried about me. They said I was reacting violently to lack of breath. I told them I was fine and actually had no issues with breathing and I was in love with the girl that was behind me. I described her beauty to them.

NO.

They told me what I thought I saw as a beautiful girl was not the case at all. I immediately realized that the gorgeous girl was not a girl, but a disgusting Troll. A foil dagger appeared in my hand as the Troll tried to attack me. I wielded the useless dagger as we moved along the edge of the pool. I was frightened. However, to my surprise, a giant Venus Flytrap Monster appeared out of the pool and swallowed the Troll. The End.

NOT.

The Troll viciously chewed and slashed his way through my Monstrous Savior. I scurried away into a warehouse and tried to get my bearings. In trudged the malicious Troll ready to sink his teeth into me. We began circling one another waiting for the other to make the first move. Desperate, I knew I was about to lose my life.....

When all was hopeless, in walked a good Troll. He rushed to my side to fight with me. Although this was helpful, the other Troll released powers stronger than we could defend against. The good Troll (this was when I switched from being myself to being the good Troll), pricked the evil Troll with a dagger and drank a bit of his blood. At that moment, the good Troll (I) transformed into a Warceror (warrior/sorcerer) and destroyed the evil Troll.

Goodness Prevails......this time.

Dreamitos

Multiple dreams. Multiple subjects.

I kept on waking up last night. Restless sleep.

Usually I have one or two solid dreams, but last night I had multiple short ones. I will share a couple of them.

One of my best friends in New Jersey lived just down the street from me. His name was Ryan Emerick. Ever since I moved from that Garden State, I have a reoccurring dream where I visit him. Last night was no different. I walked into Ry's house.....there in the living room was a young version of Ryan and his current older self, is brother, and his mom were there too.

Lately, I have been playing this game on my iPhone called Cartoon Wars. It is pretty addictive. The objective is to protect your tower, create as many army characters as possible, and destroy the enemies tower. Well, last night I was the leader of one of the armies. When I heard the enemy order to launch the trebuchet, I yelled to my archers to let loose the arrows. To my dismay, the enemy boobie trapped the battlefield and somehow opened a dam behind our line and swept us into oblivion.

DREAM BIG

My Dad was a Giant Pineapple

Zombie movies......not a particular fan of them unless there is comic relief wrapped into it like Shaun of the Dead or Zombieland or Ice Princess.

Last nights dream:

I, along with a few other compadres, entered into a decrepit compound that we knew was plagued with death. Armed with pocket knife swords that were sharp on every side and cut my hands up we entered into the humid building.

Nothing....the place was empty. It appeared that it had been abandoned for a long time. There were broken computers, vines growing everywhere, and a dusty substance.

Then we left.

Yeah right.

We trudged down a flight of stairs and entered what appeared to be an apartment. Everything looked moldy. Surprisingly, there was an aged couple sitting at the kitchen table. They were very unusual looking.

Have you ever held a peach that had been sitting out for three weeks? Furry, splotchy, sunken in at some points. These old people's faces were just like that. yuck!

I kept my distance from them.....they acted unusual....not as mindless as a zombie....but enough.

The next room had three floors. I saw what appeared to be my aunt and uncle....but only look-a-likes. Some of my compadres were with them. On the third floor, I saw another set of Aunt Nancy and Uncle Dave. What was going on? I went upstairs.

A GIANT PINEAPPLE. My dad's entire torso was an enormous delicious looking pineapple. Unusual.

Moving closer to my fruity father, I tripped and fell. In the process of falling, I accidentally, sliced my father's rough exterior belly.

Spread across the floor were smaller pineapples.....at least 20 or so. One of them was split open. Lying inside the busted fruit was an electronic device.

It clicked.

I had found the instrument needed for my compadres and I to get back to our world.

dream BIG.

So I was a good vampire....and Chuck Norris was my sidekick

Chuck Norris.

This man (or is he a man?) is a beast.

Who has seen the movie Sidekicks? It is the movie where a skinny dweebie asthmatic kid daydreams that Chuck and he kicked bad guys butts. Through his dreams and a Mr. Miagi-like character, he becomes a kick-a karate champ and meets the real Chuck Norris at the end.

So why is Chuck Norris my sidekick?

A couple weeks back I had a wicked awesome dream.

I walk into a public restroom...I quickly realize there is something unusual about me. I was not human....I was a vampire.....a good one though kinda like Blade.

In each of the urinals, are these bat-like creatures covered in slime: baby vampires. In order to save the world from these vile abominations I used my unusual super strength to crush them to smithereens.

The full size vampires did not like this.......at all.

I took off running......at an unusual speed.....and then soared up into a tree.

Guess who was in the tree with me ready to kick some vamp ass?

CHUCK NORRIS

I soon woke up.......and felt like roundhouse kicking some bloodsuckers.

Dream Big